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Life Preserver
| I'm teaching my dogs this trick.... |
| I feel this way when my twins puppies wake up from their naps..... |
| "The breeze in the garden is the wagging of his tail....." "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." ~Groucho Marx "The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too." `Samuel Butler "One reason the dog has so many friends: he wags his tail instead of his tongue" ~Unknown "Here, Gentlemen, a dog teaches us a lesson in humanity" `Napoleon Bonaparte "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog." ~Mark Twain "Some days you're the dog and some days you're the hydrant" `Unknown "Never trust a dog to watch your food" `Patrick, age 10 "Heaven goes by favour. If it went my merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in" `Mark Twain "Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through the snow." `Jeff Valdez "Dogs come when they're called. Cats take a message and get back to you later" `Mary Bly "A dog is the soul of a philosopher" `Plato "To a dog, the whole world is a smell" `Unknown "Dogs are not our whole lives, but they make our lives whole" `Roger Caras "If you think a dog can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in our pocket and then giving Fido only two of them" `Phil Pastoret "My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs think I already am" `Unknown "If you are a dog and your owner suggest that you wear a sweater....suggest that he wears a tail" `Fran Lebowitz "There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face" `Bern Williams "Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job" `Franklin Jones "Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened" `Unknown "Dear Dogs" The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of one of my plates does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I can fall faster than you can run. I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry for this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure you comfort. Dogs can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It ins not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom. If for some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine bark, try to turn the know or get your paw under the edge and try and pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years---dog attendance is not required. The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog's butt. I cannot stress that enough!!!!! |